B

Backwards Finesse
The finesse of the ten that your partner unnecessarily took and the only reason you can think he did so was because he is retarded.

Backwash Squeeze (n.)
The unfortunate drenching of the playing-room carpet when Jim, the oldest player in the club, reaches over to play a card from dummy and applies excessive pressure to his colostomy bag.

Balance (v.)
The act of keeping an auction alive allowing the opponents to improve their score.

BAM (n.)
The finishing touch on an extravagant misdefense.

Barometer (n.)
The gauge, positioned on the left-side of a team match in BBO, that accurately measures the level of depression of your team members.

Bart (n.)
A convention concocted to confuse friend and foe alike. Named after The Simpsons character.

Bath Coup (n.)
The after-effect of shouting 'Eureka!' when lying in the Jacuzzi and realizing you could have made the first 3NT you played in the afternoon session by ducking the K♥ lead whilst holding AJxx♥

BBO Expert (n.)
A self proclaimed good player who often underruffs for no reason, or passes a forcing bid.

Bennett Trial (n.)
A serious avoidance play.

Bergen Raise (n.)
A bidding tool named after someone who quit bridge... Perhaps from having to use his convention.

Bidding Box (n.)
An innovative contraption that allows its user to do with an inflection of their wrist what they used to be able to do with the inflection of their voice.

Bid Out of Turn (n.)
A technique used to bar partner from the auction before making a bid with an extremely weak hand.

Black-Criss-Cross-Coup (n.)
A coup that can only be used when there are 4 drunk players playing. The process of ruffing spades with hearts in dummy, and clubs with diamonds in hand.

Blame (v.)
1. An item more abundant than water.

2. A rough guide to the skill level of random opponents

i.e. A. Self Blame (Novice): “Sorry partner, I should have bid 1♥”

B. Opponent Blame (Intermediate): “Well, he bid, I thought he had the Queen”

C. Partner Blame (Expert): “If you had just raised me, I could have cuebid to slam!”

Blank (adj.)
The look on your partner's face when you explain to the palooka that the only way you could have set the contract was if he let the queen run round to your stiff king.

Blitz (n.)
To annihilate.

Blocked (adj.)
The state you believe your partner's mind is in after he fails to unblock your long suit twice in a row.

Board (n.)
The ennui one feels after playing a hand of bridge with someone who has as much intelligence as a lobotomised tadpole.

Bottom (n.)
That part of your anatomy that gets kicked when you go for 500 and the opponents at the other 11 tables are allowed to make 420.

Break In Tempo (n.)
An excuse used by many players to intimidate opponents by calling the director when no obvious infraction occurred.

Break the Squeeze (v.)
What to do when your girlfriend's double-dummy analysis becomes better than your single dummy analysis.

Bridge (n.)
A way to miscommunicate without a river running under it.

BridgeMate (n.)
The unfriendly electronic contraption that North has to wrestle with for the duration of a bridge session.

Bridge Base Forums (n.)
An online domain where thousands of people waste time posting things that have already happened to prove their partner wrong, and themselves right.

Broken Sequence (n.)
What happens once you fail to relay in the auction 1C-1D-1H-1S.

Brown Sticker (adj.)
A phrase used to describe the adhesive quality of one's underwear after one reaches a small slam in a suit you had not bid until the 6 level, when you suddenly realize that you have to play it.

Bust (adj.)
A very weak hand a woman keeps close to her very large chest.

Bye (interjection)
Parting remark of your partner when you score 28.7% in the No Fear Bridge Tourney